the beautiful exchange

The more that I grow towards the Father's heart, the less this world makes any sense to me. 

But with that comes an overwhelming temptation to fit in and make sense to the world. 

It's a constant tug-of-war between my spirit wanting more of Jesus but my flesh wanting this earth at the same time. 

One of the hardest things for me is what others think-- especially concerning my faith. I often worry that people think I'm "just a little over the top" or "super religious girl" or "weirdly committed to God". Even as I type those words I'm laughing at myself, fully aware of how silly that sounds. I'm not called to please people, I'm not called to alter my beliefs for anyone, I'm not called to keep my faith silent, and I'm definitely not called to make one ounce of sense to this world... In fact, I'm called to quite the opposite. 

This world should look at us Christians and think we're crazy, totally over the top, and way different than the norm. That is a mark that not many are willing to accept. That's because going to church, serving in ministry, and reading your Bible occasionally are still considered normal to the world. But what if we actually selflessly loved the people in our everyday lives, accepted inconveniences with joy, sacrificed great things that everyone assumes they're entitled to, spoke out about Jesus more than we talked about anything else, and stepped out in faith with no answer on how it would end up? 

Many people in the Church would call this "radical", but isn't this just what Jesus calls "Christian"?

Recently I heard a great message preached about this by a good friend of mine. He explained that the more of grace we experience, the more we will naturally worship in everything that we do/say/think/live.

Grace is a beautiful experience of our hearts, but earth is a beautiful experience to our eyes and bodies.

Grace goes beyond our earthly beings and that's why it fulfills eternally.

Earthly pleasure is immediate and good for a moment, but it doesn't go any further than that moment.

The only GOOD that comes from earthly pleasure/sin/toil/fun is in the exact moment that it's happening. Afterwards, follows a hollow heartbeat and usually a large chip of guilt on your shoulder.

 Whereas, the goodness of God may not be as immediate to our eyes, it's a  process of beauty that creates an eternal relationship over time.

The hardest choices I've had to make in my journey with Jesus are ones that require the most of me and pull me farther away from making sense to this world. We are called to identify the things that are in the way of us and Jesus, and not just "work on them", but S A C R I F I C E them wholeheartedly to the Father. They can be things like our careers, our friends, our egos, our time, our comfort, our plans, etc. 

Giving up what we have always known, for what we don't know.

Giving up what feels good, for what feels painfully empty.

Giving up what makes sense, for what seems to have no answer. 

Giving up what our flesh craves, for what Jesus calls us to do. 

But if we have truly tasted the goodness of the Father and experienced His grace in our hearts, nothing is actually a sacrifice. Slowly, we begin to view our "sacrifices" as opportunities to gain more of Jesus. The subtraction of earth becomes an addition of the Father in our heart.  Loss of earth is a gain of Heaven. Anytime a loss is involved, there will be discomfort and there will be pain. 

It is a reflection of what Jesus did for us on the Cross. His flesh cried out to God with fear; what made SENSE to the world was to plead innocent and escape this unjust death... but what made sense to Heaven was the opposite, and Jesus trusted that spoken promise although it was unseen. 

When God calls you and I to forfeit something or someone for His sake, it's not to punish you or make you miserable.... every single thing He calls us towards and away from is for the purpose of bringing us closer to Himself. He fuels purpose in every painful, teeth-gritting "No" we give to the world and promises another piece of who HE is in exchange. 

And it's always worth it.

Oh, so worth it.